It's Over Now
by Fate1
Summary: This is a different fic from the rest of post gift fics. Might not be a happy ending.
1. Default Chapter

It's Over Now  
  
  
RANT: I. like the rest of the Buffy fans, am sitting here in shock. While crying. How could Joss Whendon do that? (*sobbing*) WHY?!!!!  
Timeline: End of the last ep of angel(give me credit, it's 11 minutes after I saw the ending of it.  
Disclaimer: I don't own them.   
  
  
  
"It's Buffy," Angel said softly, his tear filled eyes going to Willow, who was looking at him with her own tears. "It's not bad, right? An injury, something?" he asked as he quickly sat down beside her. "She's okay?"  
Willow just sat there, shaking her head.   
No, no. It can't be- no. Not her. Not now. She's to young, I still didn't tell her, his mind raced as the frantic thoughts filled his head, trying to cover up the certainty he felt inside. He knew she was gone.  
  
He remembered when she sent him to Hell. The regret in her every movement. Those tear glazed hazel eyes meeting his, saying  
"I love you."  
She sent him into Hell to save the world.   
  
  
300 years later, or 3 months, he returned, and she still loved him. had made his fear cloaked mind realize he was still alive, and with her. How she cared for him as he slowly recovered from the centuries of torture he had endured.   
When he was dyeing, she almost killed another Slayer to save him, then gave him her own blood, knowing that draining her was his only cure. He didn't have enough strength to say goodbye  
The one day only he could remember, and carried the memory of being human. Of spending twenty-four hours as human, with her. Of being in her arms, unafraid of losing his soul. Of being allowed to love her completely, and not suffer.   
They could never belong to each other. They belonged to the souls they saved. The innocents they saved everyday. He gave her up, knowing she would die if he didn't.  
She did anyway.  
  
Angel forgot where he was as he accompanied Willow back to Sunnydale. He hadn't said a word in the past two days. He silently packed his belongs, along with a small black velvet pouch he still carried on him, and handed the keys to his car over to Giles. Silent.  
  
"You never know your strength until you're tested," he had said to Doyle. That you could give up anything. Doyle died.   
He couldn't shake the feeling he had as he sat with Cordellia in his old office, watching the commercial tape that she had shot with Doyle. Suddenly the words took on more meaning. Another unsung hero had died, and no body noticed.  
Or cared.  
  
He stood on the balcony, shirtless as the beach hit his cold flesh as guilt rushed through him. He had slept with Darla, and it hurt him more than any pain he had felt before. The cold reality hit him.  
Darla wasn't Buffy. He had killed her to save Buffy.  
  
  
He stood watching Lindsey's truck speed off into a new future, as he stood behind, watching, never able to leave the Hell he was trapped in.  
  
  
Angel watched the bright lights of LA rush past him as he came closer to Sunnydale. Giles drove, not saying a word. Willow sat beside him, every once and a while raising her gaze to look at the Watcher, then returning to the rushing countryside. He sat alone in the back, his fingers absently toying with the velvet pouch he held in his hand.   
A single tear fell down his cold cheek as he closed his eyes, sleep overcoming him.  
  
  
It was daylight as he walked the beach barefoot, the sand warm between his toes. The beach was deserted,: no life for as far as the eye could see. He sat down on a dune, surprised to see the velvet pouch beside him on the white sand.   
"I always loved you Angel, you know that."  
He turned around, startled by a voice he never though he would hear again. Buffy stood before him, her white sun dress moving slightly in the breeze. Her blonde hair was pulled back into a ponytail, he noticed as she sat down beside him, her eyes on the ocean before them.  
"I always knew that," he said to her, taking her hand in his. She looked at him, her eyes filling with tears as she shook her head. Suddenly, he looked down to their joint hands.   
Blood ran between their twined fingers, dripping to the sand below. A small puddle formed.   
"I doubted you," she said mournfully, yanking her had from his and standing up. Her white sun dress began to soak up the blood from her hand as she wiped it on it.   
"It's summers' blood. Just like mine, " she said to him, tears rolling down her cheeks as she looked toward the ocean. "She's more than a sister, she's......a part of me. The one I can't-" she broke off suddenly, her head turning to face him.  
"Ask her, Angel, please. I told her what to do. If death is my gift, life is yours to give."  
"Buffy, wait-" he began as she started running away from him.  
  
He awoke with a jerk, realizing that Giles was shaking him lightly. He opened his eyes, sitting all the way up and getting out of the car. He recognized where they had stopped.  
The Summers' home.  
he slowly walked to the door, remembering all the times he had climber up to her window, sneaking in as she slept to watch over her. Protecting her. Not once had he been there without her.   
His hand grasped the cool metal of the doorknob,twisting it slowly. It turned easily as he pushed the door open. Giles was behind him, a hand resting on his shoulder.   
"Dawn told us..... she mentioned something to tell you before-Dawn wouldn't rest until you got here. I thought it best.." the man began, moving his head to indicate the living room. Angel walked painstakingly into the room. Dawn sat curled up in a blanket on the couch, her eyes staring forward. A girl Angel recognized as Willow's girlfriend Tara sat beside her, holding Dawn's hand.  
"Dawnie-" he began, before she interrupted him.  
"She said that she left a video in her trunk. I checked, and there was nothing. but I trust her," Dawn said, not looking at him, her voice choked with tears. Angel nodded and started toward the stairs.  
As he entered Buffy's room, a new wave of tears came over him. The bed was perfectly made, her stuffed pig Mr. Gordo sat in the middle, a red bow tied to it's neck. Angel collapsed onto the bed, his hands reaching out to hold the stuffed creature. He held it as he went to her trunk, knowing that it had a false bottom. Opening it, his fingers felt along the edge of the inside, looking for the latch. Finding it, he pulled the false bottom out, revealing what use to hold a stash of wooden stakes, brass knuckles, and holy water. Now it was empty, an unlabeled video the only the flaw on the bare wooden planks. He picked it up, rising and putting it in the VCR and turned it on.  
  
The black screen lit up, as a blurred Buffy sat down in her bed, adjusting the camera so she became in focus.  
"Angel, " she began, her voice old, tired, and determined. He sank to the floor at he image of her. To him, Buffy had aged in years, her tone of voice saying that she knew she was about to die." I know if you are watching, I'm gone. " She took a deep breath, calming herself.  
"I've known for a long time that my gift to this world was my death. Another slayer dies, the next is called, right?" A ghost of a smile flashed across her lips, fading quickly. "Right now I'm getting ready to fight Glory. Spike is downstairs with weapons. He promised me that he would watch after Dawn, and I believe him. That free's you up to save me.  
" Giles doesn't know of what I am about to tell you. I'm not sure anyone does. But it's true. Every word."  
Angel rested his hands on his knees, leaning forward to the screen, tears rolling down his cheeks unknown. He was captivated by her words, not knowing what to think, not wanting to allow himself to hope that his only love could not be lost to him.  
"Go to the oracles, with Willow and Tara. They'll open it. There's this hallway, and you need to go down it. That's all I know Angel, and I hope you are able to make sense of it," Buffy continued, sighing as she rose ."I love you Angel. Remember that." She smiled to the camera, a real smile, before the screen turned to the black and white static.   
Angel leaned back, his mind already decided, knowing he didn't have to think. He'd go to the Oracles, and he'd save Buffy.  
Simple as that.  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. The Begining of the End

Chapter two.HTM It's Over Now  
Chapter Two  
The Beginning of the End  
  
  
  
**Summary** : Angel, grief stricken after Buffy's death, takes a trip to the Oracles, and finds out he might not be strong enough to save the one person he loves.  
**Author's Note** : I don't own them. 'Cause if I did, I won't share.(he he) "Scooby Doo" is owned by Hanna barabara(Hopefully, I spelled that right)  
**Rant:** I still can't believe what Joss Whendon has done!(*continues sobbing, as like last chapter*) It's going to be hard to bring her back......  
  
  
  
  
Angel forgot how it was to feel pain. Not your" I-cut-myself-pain" or "my- boyfriend-cheated-on-me" pain. This was the kind that felt like he was losing his soul all over again, but the relief of the mind-numbing pain wasn't going to come. He fought against the urge to stake himself while he directed Spike to the L.A. post office. It was odd to be sitting in a car with his former competition for Drucilla's love, morning the loss of the same person. Mourning the death of a Slayer.  
"We're here," Angel announced as he opened the passenger side door of his classic convertible. Spike did the same after shutting it off. As his elder opened the trunk to remove some items from a duffel bag, Spike groped into the pockets of his leather duster, desperate for a dose of nicotine to calm his undead nerves.  
"Isn't good for your health, " Angel commented as he lead the way to the underground parking lot. He could almost touch Spike's annoyance.  
"I'd rather be dead than this, " he mumbled, taking a long drag of the cigarette, knowing that it wouldn't lessen the sharp edge of complete defeat and helplessness that he felt. He did what Buffy had told him to do. Protect Dawn. Buffy still had died, so no of that really mattered anymore, he thought as he followed Angel into a small opening and into a cavern-like room.  
"If I don't come back out, take the car and go back to Sunnydale, " Angel said, breaking the uncomfortable silence between them." If I happen to get thrown out, or die, you'll know. " He looked back to Spike as he dumped a package of incense into an offering bowl.   
"And if I don't?" Spike asked, unable to control the craving to annoy him. He was smiling inwardly as he felt the sharp sting of Angel's smack.  
"YOU JACKASS!" Angel raged, his emotions too much and too strong inside. On a level, he was jealous of the vampire. He had been with Buffy to the last moment, and he hadn't. When Buffy had needed someone to help. she had gone to Spike. He knew that there was a bond between Spike and Buffy . And he couldn't break it.   
The rage inside disappeared as quickly as it had started. Choosing to ignore Spike, he lit the incense, and said," I beseech access to the all knowing ones."  
He used his hand to block his eyes from the flash of brilliant white light that came from the solid marble doorway, it's power pulling him into the other realm. He blinked, allowing himself to adjust to his surrounds.  
Gone were the towering Roman columns of marble. The room's decor had been replaced by gray stone, giving the area the feel of a haunted castle. A fire roared in the fireplace located near the door that he had entered. A rather comfortable chair was in front of it, the upholstery a dark wine.  
"Decor looks like it came from a Scooby Doo episode, but it intimidates the guest, rattles their nerves," a female voice said from behind him. He turned, and couldn't help but allow his jaw to drop.  
She was beautiful. Her long chestnut hair was halfway down her back, waving slightly. She was slim, with a figure of a super model. Her eyes were a pale violet, unusual because even though the color was pale, they seemed dark.   
"Who are you?" he asked, tensing. He recognized her from somewhere. Thing was, in his two hundred years, there was a lot o somewheres.  
  
  
He had been human. His father hated his son, so Liam sought out the things that would upset him the most. He walked happily into the back of a small building in his hometown of Galway, Ireland. He hated everything in the damn town, except for one special person.  
"Hello Liam," the voice of the only thing he loved said, throwing her body into his open arms. He smiled to himself as he kissed her hello. She was four years younger than his 23 years, but she made up for the difference in bed.   
"And what has my lovely Katherine been doin' this fine evening?" he asked her, pulling back from her full lips to gaze into her warm pale violet eyes, which smiled back at him.  
"Waiting for you, Liam. Always." she stated simply , smiling up to him, kissing his lips softly. He couldn't help but chuckle as she lead him to her kitchen, knowing that he needed a good cup of ale.  
"You know I'm going out tonight," Liam said to her as she set down a mug of ale. it's thick foam splashing over the rim to hit the worn wood of the table. He looked wearily at her as she sat down beside him, a frown appearing.  
"Liam, I don't know why, but please, don't go out tonight. I feel as if..... once you walk out that door to the tavern, I'll never see you alive again."  
  
He had ignored his love's warning, which had come true. That night Darla had turned him into Angelus. After attacking his family, he went in search of her, only to find that his once caring love had sold her soul for immortality. Angelus, amused by a human that matched his own evil, had taken her as a companion, deciding not to change her. For a century they tormented Europe, until Darla got jealous of the strong bond between them. So, she killed her.  
  
"So, you have come here to save the Slayer," the woman said, moving to a chair that sat in front of the fire.  
"How do I do it?" he asked, not moving. She laughed, looking up to him.  
"You really think you can?" she said through her giggles. He looked at her, trying to figure out why she looked like she didn't belong to the room. Wearing dark leather pants, and a red halter could have been the reason. The last oracles where on the ancient Roman side of things.  
"Sorry, I just thought that you of all people would try to save her, " she said, her giggles subsiding." But, I doubt you'll make it. No one has."  
It took a moment for him to register her words, as the room around him burst into flames. He shielded his eyes from the light as the woman stood in the middle of the flames, a smile on her lips.   
"test number one Liam," she began, moving toward him," Is to get to the other side of this room. You have an hour before there in't a space in the middle. You'll burn." With that, she turned and walked through the fire, leaving him to contemplate his choices as the fire drew closer to him.  
  
  
  
  



	3. Trial by Fire

Chapter Three  
Trial by Fire  
  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them.... even though I wish I did. They belong to the evil genius god Joss Whendon, who keeps us on a very large cliff hanger for four months....(* hangs her head in defeat as she screams, "WHY?!!"*)  
Rant: I still can't get over the fact that she's dead..... but, last night I read this funny interview with Joss, and now am trying to add a little humor to my depressing fic of mine..... please remeber, though, I'm not very good with comedy....  
Summary: Take a trip away from our wonderful hero Angel to the mind of the woman he is trying to save from death...... then, back to Angel....... Not to mention the fire filled room I left him in.  
  
  
  
  
It's really cold here, she thought to herself as she huddled her body closer in, trying to warm her freezing body, somewhat grateful. that she hadn't worn her tank top to battle Glory, the Hell -God who had tried to kill her sister. Failed, you blonde idiot, she though, not holding back the laugh that filled her. She might have died, but at least she looked good doing it.  
Buffy sighed, trying to pull the strength together so she could stand and figure out where she was. If her plan had worked, she should be in Hell, the same place where Angel had been only two years ago.  
The idea had struck her as she was on her way to her house to collect weapons. Spike was silent beside her, so her thoughts turned inward. She knew that she wouldn't be able to stop Glory in time to stop the ritual involving Dawn. There had to be a way to stop it without killing Dawn. As she filled a duffel bag with battle axes, knifes and stakes, she noticed a small flicker of silver at the bottom of her weapons trunk. Curious, she picked it up.   
She wasn't that surprised to see the burn marks still there on the surface. She slowly dropped the duffel bag bag to the floor as she brushed a stray tear from her cheek. Just like then, she was going to give everything up to save the world.   
  
"No friends, no hope. Take that away and what's left?" Angelus said, taunting her as he went for the kill. She closed her eyes, defeat washing over her. The final battle was here, and from the way things looked, she had lost. Her sword lay useless out of her reach, and the sharp point of his was only inches away from her throat.  
As Angelus drew the sword back to add a dead Slayer to the list of his accomplishments, Whistler's words cam back to her. She had told him she had nothing left to lose. As she left him alone at Giles's apartment, she heard his reply.  
"Wrong kid, you have one more thing."  
Angel went to Hell. She had sent her lover, with a soul, to centuries of torture, not knowing if she was ever going to see him again. Months later, when she had left the claddaugh he gave her at the mansion as her final goodbye, he came back from Hell, the ring lost. At graduation, though, as she watched his silhouette against the smoke, she felt something in her pocket. She removed it, startled to find the claddaugh on her palm.  
  
  
She sighed again, as she pushed herself to her feet, a groan coming from her lips at the soreness in her muscles. Looks like being dead doesn't include the loss of feelings, she thought as she looked around.   
It looked hideous. She was in a cell. Dark, cold, and rather rank metal bars ran from the ceiling to the floor, thick as 3 2x4's. There wasn't any way that she was going to break through them. The other three walls that enclosed her were moss damp stone bricks. Giving up on the idea of a secret doorway, she sat back down, and waited.  
  
"You know this isn't real."  
She looked up, her mother's smiling face beside her. She raised her head, confusion washing over her.   
"Mom?" she asked, her voice filled with child-like hope. A shaken head was her response.  
"Don't worry, Buffy. Dawn is alright. That wonderful vampire Spike is taking care of our baby girl." Buffy smiled at that, her fears about her sister calmed for a moment.   
"Then what is Spike trying to do?"  
"Oh no," her mom said, her hand trailing lightly on her daughters's hair, smiling."It's not Spike. It's Angel."  
  
  
  
He estimated that her had about five minutes.   
As the flames neared him, he thought to remove his duster, knowing it might attract flames. The way through the fire was lost on him. I've got to find a way, he thought, his effort s renewed by the thought that if he didn't make it, he would never see his love again.  
  
  
"What about me?" she asked, her tears flowing freely as she looked up to him."What about-Angel, I love you so much- and I've tried to make you go away. I killed you and it didn't help-" she went on. His eyes filled with teats at her declaration of love, even after all he had do to him. Tormented her innocent love for him, killed her friends, and tried to kill her so many times he lost count. Yet he still loved her. Always would.  
  
  
Angel growled in frustration, trying to find a way to get past the flames that inched every closer to him....  
  
"The hands stand for friendship, " he said, not able to meet her eyes. The circle of silver caught and reflected the lights from the docks. She watched him, her eyes beginning to gleam with unshed tears. "The crown loyalty, and..." his voice trailed off, not knowing if he could put his feelings into words. "Well, you know, " he said, embarrassed.   
  
  
Of course, he told himself, cursing his brain because it couldn't come up with the answer. Quickly, he removed the velvet pouch he had been carrying, and removed what was inside. Shining just like the day he bought it, was a claddaugh ring. He slid it on his finger, the heart facing toward him. He stepped up to the flames, praying to every god he knew that this would work. Taking a deep breath, he took a step forward into the flames.   
They surrounded him, hungry, starved animals thirsty for his flesh, no matter how dead it was. Yet, he did not burn. He felt as if his skin was burning off in layers, yet he still was alive. He ran in the direction he thought was the other side of the room. As the cool air reached him, he heard the slow, sarcastic applauding behind him. He looked up, gasping for breath to see the woman standing in front of him, offering her hand to help him up. He brushed it aside, choosing to rise to his feet on his own accord.  
"Congratulations," she said." Test number one has been completed. Only two more to go,Liam."  
  
  



	4. Cold as Ice

It's Over Now  
Chapter 4  
Cold as Ice  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them. The tags saw "Property of Joss Whendon and Company". I wish I did. Maybe if I put them on my wish list......  
Summary: Angel's gotten past test number one..... can he survive the rest? If you haven't read the previous chapters, please do so now.  
Comments from the author I just got back from the doctor, and feel like shit.(Pardon my French) So, this chapter will be depressing. Just thought I'd warn you. And has anyone else heard what Joss said about Angel next season? That he'll have more important things to worry about?(*vamps out into Angelus*) Yeah right! (*returns to normal self*) I've left out the whole spoiler thing......we've got season three and two spoilers, for sure, and season five...... okay, we've got a lot here.......  
  
  
  
  
Angel watched the woman, not sure what to do. She had changed outfits, now wearing a long black skirt, it's sides slit up to her hip, and a matching tank top. Her dark hair was pulled up, showing a small scar on her neck. The demon inside him snickered, knowing how that scar got there.  
"You know who I am, don't you?" she asked quietly, her eyes not meeting his. He arched his eyebrows, not sure what to think of her sudden mood change.  
"Yes, Katherine, I do," he said, hid voice equally soft. He knew that he was the one who corrupted her. And part of him was glad of it.  
"Anyway, Liam, maybe you should know where your precious Buffy is," she said, the amusement returning to her voice. "You were smart enough to figure out how to get through the flames, but are you smart enough to figure out why she's still alive? It's not an every day occurrence that a Slayer, or anyone, for that matter, stays alive after they've died." She chuckled, watching the now small flames in the fireplace across the room.   
"How about you cut the dramatics and tell me," he growled, his patience running out. "You always took the longest time to get to the point if I remember." Her laughter was her response.   
"Liam, you never learn, do you?" she asked, picking up a hand mirror from the carved coffee table, handing it to him. His eyes gazed at the cloudy surface as an image appeared.  
He recognized the cell. He had lost count of how many times they had held him in that cell, starved and cold, too weak to escape from them. It had come to be a refuge, after the first decade. A place to try to gather his wits before they came again to torture, defile, and try to break his will. Instead of him in the cell, however, there was Buffy, curled on the floor, asleep, her wrists chained to the wall.   
"Buffy......" he whispered painfully, knowing all to well what would happen next. They would come, and take her to one of the dozen of torture rooms, and for days she would be there, trying to live for the next moment where they might take her out of the room.....  
"Yes, she's where you should be, " Katherine said from beside him, looking into the mirror." It was her Claddaugh that brought you back from Hell, and she used that fact to stay alive after she jumped into that opening, so Dawn wouldn't t have to die. She took your place, dear Liam."   
" How do I get her out?" he asked, tearing his eyes away from the sleeping image of Buffy. Katherine smiled, her eyes triumphant.  
"Pass the next two tests, of course, " she said, opening a door to his left. He entered silently, hearing the door shut behind him. He looked around him, startled to find himself in the familiar countryside outside Galway.  
The country-side was white with a deep winter's snow. The nearby woods were silent and dark. He knew where he was. The small cemetery was just outside the town's main drag. he knew who was buried there. The list was long, and he wondered how he was able to remember every soul who was unfortunate to be buried there.   
His own body was one of the first. His sisters and younger brother soon followed, there deaths more violent than his own. His mother and father came, along with half the village of Galway, only after a month in his new existence as the undead. He shivered against the breeze as his gaze scanned the area, not knowing what to do.  
  
  
  
"Get up Missy, it's time for your hour of fun," a harsh male voice said, intruding into her sub conscience and forcing her to open her eyes. The man wasn't a human man. AS she pushed herself to her feet, she finally realized that her wrists were loosely chained to the stone wall behind her. The chains were long; enough length to have her not notice them. Then right length to give the person comfort, but still confine them.  
"That's it," the thing said. Buffy looked more closely at it, and tried to contain a giggle. Dwarf-sized with a rough green skin, it looked as if it had walked straight out of her fairy tale version of goblins.  
"You know what Toto?" she said quietly as the goblin unlocked her chains from the wall and roughly pulled her out of her cell."I don't think we are in Kansas anymore."  
  
  
Angel wandered to the entrance to the small, overgrown cemetery, not knowing why he was heading that way. He almost tripped over the first headstone. He knelt onto one knee, not feeling the cold snow beneath his knee. The stone's writings were covered by the snow. He brushed it away, reading the name.  
  
Jenny Calendar  
  
  
A gasp escaped his lips, forming in the cool air around him. Why would her grave be in Ireland?, he thought. Thinking, he went to the next gravestone, brushing the snow aside.  
  
  
Buffy Anne Summers  
  
He noticed something wrong about the stone. The dates weren't right. Instead of her death in 2001, it was in 1997, the day after her birthday. Angel stood up, the wind catching the loose material of his search. He finally understood this test. He had to make his way through the cemetery, and relive every horrible death and pain he had caused....  
  
  
  
  
  



	5. Pure as Blood

Pure as Blood.HTM **It's Over Now  
** **Chapter 5  
** **Pure as Blood  
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** **Summary: ** Where I left off.....read chapters 1-4 please.  
**Disclaimer** : I don't own them, except for Katherine. And if you steal her, I will send you to Hell, where you can play with Angelus....  
**Author's Notes:** This is my first torture scene. Give me a little credit, I'm not a violent person. If it sucks, I'm sorry. Just don't send flames. They burn up my mailbox.......  
  
  
  
  
Buffy Anne Summers was the Slayer. The Chosen One. Super-human strength, the whole deal.. And yet she was begging for them to stop.  
She had expected physical torture. That wasn't as bad as what they were doing now. She almost wished they would return to whipping her. It was bearable. She knew where she was, and more importantly, who she was.  
They were cruel. Choosing the most painful events in her life..... and making her relive them. Kinda like sitting in on a movie, a somewhat sane part of her mind whispered. It was, in a sense. She saw herself waking up in Angel's bed, alone and afraid. No, that's over now,  she told herself, clinging to the only hope she had left. Angel got his soul back, and he's fine.   
  
  
A clash of thunder woke a 17 year old Buffy Summers from her peaceful sleep. She turned to where her love was asleep beside her.... and found it empty. She pulled the burgundy sheet around her naked form, suddenly cold.   
"Angel?" she whispered, knowing that deep inside, something very bad had happened, and her Angel was gone.....  
  
"That's over now," she told herself, bringing her mind back to the present. Yet the pain was still fresh in her mind. She felt pity for the innocent thing she was back them. That had changed, because Angelus had taught her that one hard lesson she herself could almost pretend that she had never had to learn it.   
People could be very cruel.  
"Had enough yet, Slayer?" the goblin that had brought her here asked, it's sharp little teeth gleaming in the firelight. Buffy looked around her, becoming disgusted with the room. She was chained to the wall by the chains she had worn since she arrived in Hell, and the smell of sulfur filled her lungs. It looked like the Hell of child's imaginations and cartoons. Fire pits, demons laughing at the screaming victims that they tortured. Buffy sighed, closing her eyes as she prayed that Angel would rescue her.  
  
  
Angel walked to the next grave, not knowing if he could make it past the last grave. Tears were streaming down his face, and he could barely walk.  One more grave , he thought, his sanity grasping to that single thread of hope. He had to face every one from Jenny Calendar to the human Drucilla.   
He almost tripped over the last stone. Small, gray, concrete showed as a small sliver about the snow. He knelt down, curious that the last stone was so small and unattended. As he brushed the snow away, a smear of blood stained the pure white. He looked down, and gasped.  
His name appeared on the stone, the letters plain, only showing the word,"Angel". As he stared at the writing, the surface became blurred , as a picture filled the space....  
  
" Where have you been?" Buffy asked as he slowly walked down the stairs to his apartment, worry on her face.  
"I went to see the Oracles," he said finally, not knowing what else to say. He knew he didn't have a lot of time, and wanted to do so much more...  
"What-why?" Buffy stammered, walking toward him. He took a deep breath, knowing there was no other way to say what he had to say. Closing off his heart and soul from the pain that began trying to convince him to go back. One day wasn't enough, his soul screamed as he ignored it.  
"Because more than ever how much I love you," he answered, his blind eyes gazing into her now unbelievable ones.  
"No. No, you didn't," she said, backing away from him, denial taking over her. Angel wanted to join her in that place, but knew if he did, he would be the cause of her death.  
" And if I stayed mortal one of us would wind up dead, maybe both of us," he continued, following her. "You heard what Mohra said," he added, trying to make her understand why he was killing his own soul.  
"Mohra is dead. We killed him," she responded, turning her tear filled eyes on him.  
"He said others would come," he reminded her, deciding that he wasn't titled to be alive, or undead.   
"They always come. And they always will. But that's my problem now, not yours, remember?" she said angrily, reminding him of one of the many reasons he now had the impossible task of walking away from her.  
"No. I won't just stand by and let you fight, maybe die, alone," he told her, putting his fears into words in front of them , knowing she would fight to the very end. She always did.  
"Then we fight together," she retorted, her mind too far in denial to let the truth sink in. Deep inside she knew Angel was right, but didn't want to let her dreams slide through her fingers for a final time.  
"You say what happened last night," he said, forcing the words to come out."If anything I'm a liability to you. You take chances to protect me, and that's not just bad for you, it's bad for the people we were meant to help," he finished, telling her that he no longer could be her savior.  
"So what? You took a whole 24 hours to weigh the ups and downs of being a regular Joe and decided it was more fun being a super hero?" she yelled back at him, going into trying to make him anger at himself. Only if she knew with every word she said, he was dyeing a little death...  
"You know that's not it, How can we be together if the cost is your life, or the lives of others?"  
  
Angel sunk to his knees, his tears flowing down his cheeks as he watched the scene. The tears of blood dripped to the pure milky snow, staining the crystals to the bright red color. Faint trails of blood marked his cheeks as he reached a hand out to the image, not being able to hold the love of his life.  
  
  
Buffy watched the mirror the goblin held before her, the truth finally being revealed as tears of remembrance rained down her face, damning Angel to the hell she was now end. As the scene played, and her tears fell, she didn't notice that her tears were blood, that left a stain trail down her pale cheek, dripping to the floor, the same as An gel's. Nether knew that at that moment, the memories where shared, not just remembered by one....  
  
As the truth finally hit Buffy, she let the tears fall as she falls into Angel's loving arms. Sighing, he rest his head on hers, a single tear escaping.  
"I know. I couldn't tell you. I wasn't sure-" he stopped, taking a moment to regain control over his emotions." -if I could do it if I woke up with you one more morning." Buffy sniffled, raising her head to look into his eyes.  
"I understand," she said slowly." So what happens now?" Angel took a breath as he glanced at the clock. It was close enough. He knew when he went to the Oracles he could only see Buffy in pain for only a short moment...  
"The Oracles are giving us back the day, turning back time, so I can kill the Mohra before his blood makes me mortal."   
"When?" she asked, hoping that she could make love to him one more time. He looked to the clock.  
9:00  
"Another minute, " he told her, his arms tightening around her body, the panic finally setting in. Could he make it that long?  
" A minute?" Buffy cried, her tears freely flowing like a mountain stream in winter."No. No, it's not enough time!"  
"We don't have a choice. It's done," he said, his voice raw with held back emotions. Buffy lifted her pain and grief stricken eyes to him.  
"How am I suppose to go on with my life knowing what we had?" she whispered, a sob raking her body."What we could have had?"   
"You won't," he told her, offering the only comfort he could." No one will know but me."  
"Everything we did...." she said, remembering the heat soaked night they shared.   
"It never happened," he said, not just to her, but to himself, knowing that forgetting himself would have to begin now. He felt Buffy shaking her head.  
"It did. I know it did!" she exclaimed, placing a hand on his chest."I felt your heart beat."   
Their lips meet, starving to get as close as possible, knowing that the single minute can not make up for the lifetime they could have shared together. Buffy pulls back, frantically looking at the clock, their last minute almost up.  
"No! Oh god, it's not enough time....." she whispers, as Angel's tears fall onto her hair.  
"Shh, please. Please," he begs her, not knowing if he can live with the knowledge that he held her in his arms. He tightened his hold on her as she did him, both wanting to fuse their bodies together, so they wouldn't have to leave each other.  
"No,:" Buffy says as the second hand reaches closer to the twelve, knowing that she has only seconds. Angel cried, knowing himself that Buffy was the lucky one. She would never know.  
"I'll never forget, I'll never forget I'll never forget," she said to him, both of them knowing that she would as she was ripped away.....  
  
Angel collapsed in the snow, his eyes staring blankly at the image of him holding Buffy in his arms, chanting that she would never forget.  I can't do this anymore, he thought to himself, the weight of the world finally breaking his soul. Just as he finished the thought, a stake appeared beside him. he picked it up, a hand running over the smooth wood surface.  
"Why not end it?" he said outloud, tossing the stake between his hands."What else is there to lose?" 


	6. Play by the Rules

Play by the Rules.htm ** It's Over Now  
** **Chapter 6  
** **Play by the Rules  
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** **  
** **  
** **Summary: ** Katherine is debating if she should listen to advice given to her by a special person and save Angel from killing himself, or to let him die.....  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own them. Joss Whendon does that.   
  
  
  
Katherine watched Angel as he picked up the stake, inviable to him. She sat on a nearby grave, not caring who's it was. She watched, her outfit oblivious to the snowy scenery. Long silk skirt, slit up to the thigh on each side, a tank top, and knee-high boots. She crossed her ankles, disturbed at the picture she saw.  Liam never cried, she thought, puzzled. She had spent so long watching him over the centuries, and never saw him cry. Not over her.  
  
  
Katherine laughed as she was lifted and spun around by Liam. The tavern was noisy, the fishing crowd filling the small establishment. He set her down, placing a kiss on her waiting lips.   
"Lass, you are the death of me," he said, laughing along with her. Tonight was her nineteenth birthday, and he had decided that for her present, they would spend the evening celebrating at her favorite tavern, then retiring to her own bed, for more entertaining activities.  
They left the tavern in fits of laughter, his arm around her waist. They walked slowly to her house, stealing kisses every other street.  
"Just a second," he said, stopping before she unlocked the door. She turned, her violet eyes smiling.  
"What, love?" she asked, turning to face him. He smiled as he removed a small bag from his pocket.   
"Liam?" she asked softly , her eyes raising to meet his. He returned her gaze as he opened the bag. Taking her hand, while still having eye contact, he placed a small piece of metal in her palm. Surprised, she looked down to see a Claddaugh, shining silver in the moonlight, resting there.  
"Until forever," he whispered, lowering his lips to hers, kissing her softly.  
  
  
"He's not suppose to die, you know," a male Irish voice said from beside her. She didn't acknowledge him, she kept watching the scene before her.  
" If you let him die, the boss wouldn't like it," he said, placing a hand on her shoulder. She turned to him, a ironic smile on her lips.  
"He never cried for me, " she told him. Doyle smiled, feeling sorry for her. "And he won't die. He;s gotten past test number two." With a snap of her fingers, Angel vanished. She stood up, turning to the entrance of the cemetery. He followed beside her.  
"Ever notice how he forgot about me?" she asked as the snowy countryside faded to the dark atmosphere of the Oracles room. She collapsed on a couch, not even glancing at the still figure of Angel on the floor beside her. A single tear betrayed her self-control and fell down her cheek. " But, if I had a choice to whom I would give him to, I would choose her," she told him, sighing as she rose to her feet. "She knows what love is," Doyle agreed, watching as Angel began to wake. "Don't you think it's time to give the last test?"  
  
  
  
  



	7. Goodbye Love

Goodbye Love-ch. 7.htm **It's Over Now  
** **Chapter 7  
** **Goodbye Love  
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** **Summary:** This is the big ol' chapter where major events happen. Enough said. Spoilers for "Hero", Angel season 1, and "The Trial", Angel season 2.  
**Disclaimer:** Joss owns them. I can only dream.... The title of this chapter is from a song from the musical "Rent" , by Jonathan Larson. I recommend you see it. Breaks all the stereotypes about musicals.   
**Author's Notes and Rants:** No one has reviewed my story in a while. (* wipes a tear away*) I'm hurt. So, if you have a soul, please review. Your opinion is valuable.   
  
  
"Angel," Buffy murmured as she woke up, her hair a blonde tangle. Pushing it out of her face, she sat up, her muscles screaming in protest. Leaning her back against the wall, she closed her eyes, sighing. She hadn't slept well. What sleep she got was filled with nightmares, and re-liveing the one day she had been denied the memory of.   
A clatter of metal dragged her out of her thoughts. The goblin had returned, baring a metal tray that had some sort of food on it.   
"Here you go, Missy," the goblin said, opening her cell and sitting the tray down, the gruel slopping over the edge of it's bowl. She grimaced as she crawled over to the tray, the goblin snickering as he went on to the next cell. Picking up the spoon, she tried the oatmeal like liquid.   
Her gaging could be heard a mile away.  
  
  
Katherine tossed Angel a bag of blood as she walked toward a bookcase. He took it silently, wondering how she had know he was hungry. Once before he had to go through three trials to try to give Darla a new lease on life. He had gone through all three, and wasn't able to save her from being turned again, this time by Drucilla,.  
"So what other hoops do you want me to jump?" he asked outloud, stopping Katherine in her tracks. He was pissed, and wasn't afraid of letting her know.  
"It's not my choice, " she said softly, taking a worn volume from the bookcase, then retuning to the seat in front of him. Curling her legs under her, she opened the thick leather volume, blowing lingering dust away.  
"Then why are you here?" Angel asked, annoyed. He had his fill of her cryptic remarks and told her so.  
"Liam, you never understood, " she said, her voice barely above a whisper. He sat quiet for a moment, taken aback by her change of mood.   
  
  
It was Anna, the servant at Liam's home, who ran in the pouring rain that last morning, tripping over her skirts and falling in the mud. Determined, she pushed herself back up and continued running. Reaching her destination, she knocked frantically on the door, almost hitting Katherine in the face when she opened the door.  
"Anna, what happened?" Katherine exclaimed, placing a hand on Anna's shoulder and pulling the young woman inside, closing the door behind her.  
"Miss, please, I have to tell you-" Anna stammered, pulling away as Katherine removed her mud stained shawl, tossing it aside.  
"Calm down, Anna, you can tell me once you are clean," Katherine said gently, guiding the frightened woman to the bath house that was connected to her small home. Once Anna had the mud cleaned off her body, and replaced her gown with a clean one, Katherine sat her down in the kitchen with a glass of whiskey.   
"Now, tell me what is wrong," Katherine said. Anna looked up to her, eyes dripping tears as she took a deep breath.   
"It's Liam. Daniel found him in an alley early this morning....." Anna began, a sob entering her voice.  
"No, no, it can't be him.," Katherine said, fear washing over her like an angry ocean. "NO. He wouldn't- he couldn't....." she went on, running toward the door.  
"But miss, the killer..... a demon!" Anna shouted at Katherine's silhouette running into the pouring rain.  
  
  
  
Pulling herself out of her memories, she stood. Looking at Angel, she stood, and walked over to a door he hadn't seen before. He stood, walking toward her.   
" It's over," she began softly, her eyes cast to the floor. "Buffy is free to go. Go through this door, and you'll find her."   
"That's it?" he asked, knowing there had to be a catch. There always was. Just like when he had to save Darla. The second test had required him to simply unlock a door. Thing was, the key was in a pool of Holy water, in a hall made of crosses. He knew it simply couldn't be that  simple.  
"Oh, by the way Liam, " she said softly as he placed a hand on the doorknob,. He stopped, waiting for her to continue. "Once you cross that threshold, I die. Just thought you might want to know," she finished, turning from him and returning to her place on the couch. "A life for a life, remember?"   
  
  
Katherine pulled her cloak around herself tighter, not wanting anyone to realize it was her. Saddling a horse, she rode out of town, the sun setting behind her. It was a short ride to the Elder's house.  
Everyone in Galway knew that the old crone was a gypsy. The taverns whispered about how successful her love charms were, and how powerful her vengeance spells were. Hoping that all she had heard was true, she knocked on the timeworn wooden door, holding her breath. After several moments, the door slowly opened. The woman looked ancient, wrinkles on top of wrinkles, her face defying gravity.   
"Yes dearie?" she croaked, startling Katherine that her voice was strong.   
"I want to live forever."  
  
  
  
  
  
"What do you mean?" Angel asked her, kneeling down beside her. As Angelus, and Liam, he had spent so much time by her side that he knew that she was speaking the truth.   
"Someone has to maintain the balance," she told him, not meeting his gaze. "When you went to Hell, the balance between dimensions was not right. God- I can't explain it right. " She met his eyes, her voice certain." You and Buffy are more important than you can even imagine. Without you two..... together..... Buffy will stay dead. And in hell. When you walk through that door, I will take Buffy's place in the void she filled when she jumped in Dawn's place," she finished. "I can't decide. It's your choice." Standing, Katherine walked to the door he had entered from, closing it softly behind her. Shocked, he collapsed on a nearby chair, resting his head on his hands, needing to think.   
He had been right earlier. The decision was simple.   
He could stay with his fist love, the lost cause that had been credit for some of his more evil tasks. She had been Angelus's pride and joy, causing jealousy in his sire, Darla. She couldn't understand that a human could match his lust for pain, who could match his passion. Katherine could. She had, thus enough reason for Darla to kill her. In the four hundred years Darla had been alive, there had been a person that made her scared.   
Or go and save Buffy, the one he was meant to live eternity with. he had given so much of his soul to her, he didn't know where his ended and hers began. Even though they couldn't be together, he knew, in a single moment, that he would do anything for the Slayer. He just didn't know if he could kill Katherine.  
  
  
  
The old woman laughed as she ushered Katherine to sit in a chair. Once she was seated, the old woman went to a small cabinet by the fireplace. Groaning and grasping her back with a clawed hand, she opened it and removed a small vile and a worn leather book.  
"The price for what you ask is high," the old woman said, placing the book on the table, a cloud of dust clouding the view of it for a moment.   
"I don't care," Katherine said firmly, her eyes, usually the warm pale violet , were hard, cold, and empty. The old crone gazed at her for a moment, then chuckled.  
"Aye dearie, I believe you don't. My deepest sympathies, though, for Liam. It's amazing that he could find someone like you," she said, and opened the worn book. "The price you have to know. You will live forever. No diseases will harm you, but, the regular methods of killing people will work on you. No a day shall you age from this moment."  
"Fine," Katherine said, not really caring." Go ahead."  
"But my dear.," the crone said , a trace of concern etching her wrinkled face. "The price is your soul. Are you willing to give that up?"  
"Listen, I didn't ask for your opinion," Katherine said, rage glowing in her eyes, the emotion virgin to her." Just do whatever you have to do. Just give me what I came here for."   
The crone sighed, and passed the vial to her. "Drink. "  
Not taking a moment to hesitate, Katherine raised the small glass vial to her lips, not even thinking that the monster who took Liam would be able to see that she wasn't merely a simple human.   
She was a monster. Just like him.  
  
  
  
  
Katherine sighed as she closed the door behind her. This room was what the previous Oracles had used. She didn't like the stiff and formal Roman marble columns, and empty space. It held an air of....   
"You told him, didn't you?"   
Katherine nodded to Doyle as she sat down on the small stairs that lead to the hallway that Buffy had told Angel to go in. Doyle sat down beside her, placing a comforting arm around her shoulders. Allowing a tear to fall, she dropped her head to his shoulder, knowing that this might be the last human contact she would have. Because she knew, deep inside, that Angel would choose Buffy.   
"I knew, when this started, I was going to die. The Powers were kind enough to let me attempt to handle this situation," Katherine murmured, rolling her eyes at the empty room. "I knew. This second chance isn't going to last. But......." her voice trailed of, her eyes looking to the closed door she had entered from. Doyle stayed silent, feeling empathy for the young woman. She loved Angel. Enough to realize that she had to allow him to be with Buffy. To allow them to be together, she had to sacrifice herself.   
He knew the feeling. He loved Cordy, but he knew he had to die to save the people he had ignored. They weren't demons to him anymore. They were people, who had come to him for help. And he had denied them that. When that first vision came. he knew, deep inside, that what he saw was true. His kin had been murdered, because he was having a hard time coping. The small child's shoe, the father that had begged him for assistance. The pure hatred that had filled his soul was not for the Scourge, who had killed, but for himself.   
They all had their own demons, he thought, comforting Katherine, who had been his friend in the afterlife. he just didn't know if she could cope with hers.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	8. Death

It's Over Now  
Chapter 8  
Death  
  
  
  
Summary: Read chapter title.  
Disclaimer: Yeah right. I wish I owned them. Also, I dare Fox to sue me. I DARE YOU!! Just see how many million you waste on me just to own my BTVS and ANGEL book collection and scrapbooks.  
Author's Note: I just got done reading 3 hours of fanfic, and I am ready to start some new fic. But first I have to end this one. Thanks to all the KIND people who reviewed this. I love you all. To those who didn't, I hope you burn in hell and have Angelus torture you with Ms. Edith.  
  
  
  
  
  
Buffy Anne Summers felt like she was loosing her soul.  
As the whip hit her now numb flesh, she could hear the wet slap of the leather on her bleeding and torn skin. The whip had just started, before this the goblins decided they were bored and played tic-tac-to. On her back, using brands and knifes. The salt they had rubbed in had long since stopped burning. She could feel the warm blood pull around her body, the calming thought that they would stop soon entering her mind.  
That was the rule of their game. Now matter how much they did, they stopped right before she crossed the line into death. It had come to be her only way of keeping hold of the thinning strand of sanity. Also, knowing that Angel wouldn't leave her here. As unconsciousness graced it's healing salve on her mind, she smiled, a small smile. She was going to beat the shit out of the goblins once Angel came and saved her.   
  
  
  
  
Angel stood, finally gaining enough strength to say his goodbye to Katherine. AS he knocked on the door she had left from, he promised himself that he would make sure her death was not in vain. To keep her memory, and her love, alive inside him for eternity.   
The door opened, revealing Katherine, her eyes raising to meet his, pale violets filled with rain.  
"Katherine," he said softly, pulling her into his arms. She came willingly, resting her head on his chest as he held her, knowing his decision Angel smoothed down her dark hair, trying to offer comfort. She raised her eyes to him, the tears still lingering.  
"I love you," she said softly. Closing his eyes, he lowered his lips to hers, kissing her softly, just like he had done every day so many years ago in Galway. She slowly wrapped her arms around his neck as he tightened his around her waist, increasing the pressure of his lips against hers, knowing this would be the last time he held her in his arms.   
It was she who pulled back, a smile on her face as she walked to the door leading to Buffy. She reached into her pocket, and motioned for him to come to her.   
"Forever's gone past, my love," she said, placing a ring into his palm. he looked down, seeing the Claddaugh he had given her resting on his palm. "But her's is only beginning. " Reaching to a coat rack behind her, she gave him duster, unmarked by the flames he had left it in.  
"I don't know what to say," he said, not sure if he was thinking it inside his mind or speaking it. He raised his head to meet Katherine's gaze, surprised to see her eyes smiling, the pale violet returning to the care-free nature he had fallen in love with.  
"Nothing at all," she told him, opening the door. Giving her one last glance, he walked over the threshold, not turning back to see Katherine fall limply to the floor, the last image of Angel the last thing she saw before her death.  
  
  
  
It took almost an hour for him to find his former cell. He had spent centuries being hauled down the corridors. He paid no attention to the pleas for freedom that surrounded him. Most recognized him, and knew he could have helped. He didn't. He was here to save the one thing that he would give anything for to see again.  
"Angel," a voice said from behind him. He stopped, and let his evil self wash over him for a moment, the sense of morbid humor that belonged only to Angelus. Turning, he smiled, facing the goblin like creature who had held him captive for so long.   
"You should have stayed with Cinderella, " Angel said, allowing his vampire face to emerge. the goblin's eyes betrayed his nervousness and fear. Angel laughed as he darted out and grabbed the goblin's throat, snapping it back, a sense of delight filling him as he heard the bones breaking. He let the body drop, as he reverted back to his human face.  
"Bastard," he murmured as he knelt beside the dead goblin and removed the rusted key that hung at his waist. If his memory served, the cell should be the one on his right.  
For a moment, as he opened the cell door, he only saw dried pools of blood, ripped clothing, and a pale form in the corner, her blonde hair stained by her own blood.  
"BUFFY!" he cried out, running and dropping to his knees beside her. Gently turning her over, he gasped at the fact that her face was unmarked, the same flawless beauty he had loved. Shaking her gently, he brought her back to consciousness.  
"Angel?" she said, a parody of what he had said when he realized, on his arrival back in Sunnydale, that the Buffy before him wasn't another form of torture. He nodded, his throat suddenly raw with emotion. Pulling her into his arms, he wrapped his duster around her bruised and battered body, gently rising to his feet, wanting to get her to a hospital.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"ANGEL!!! I am not going to allow you to choose green china!" Buffy ranted as she saw what wedding china he had chosen. He grinned, loving how her eyes shined when she was angry.  
"I'm not going to allow green china either," Dawn said, taking Buffy's side. Angel couldn't help but chuckle at the two, Older and younger sister standing side by side, hands placed on their hips in a sign of defiance   
"Of course not," Angel said, wrapping a arm around Buffy's waist, steering her to a display of Elvis plates. Dawn followed behind, slowly, wanting to take in the sight of her sister, her savior, finally happy.   
The fist Slayer had told Buffy that death was her gift. She wasn't told that it wasn't her death that was suppose to be given. Dawn smiled as Buffy began to rant about the latest joke in plates, so innocent to what had happened to get her back. Even though Angel hadn't said a single word about Katherine, Dawn knew. Being the Key has some perks, she thought as she went to catch with Buffy and Angel.  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
